The Baystate Objectivist

The Baystate Objectivist

Wednesday, June 11, 2008


To Pine Point.

This morning the UMass arbor crew was out tending emergency services to the massive and ancient old willow in Southwest. The tree was hit last night by a lightning bolt.

Believed to be one of the oldest residents of Amherst, the tree was wounded on its right side.

Happily, its injuries did not appear to be life threatening.

A person told me a weird story recently. They said that many years ago at the Northampton Alcoholics Anonymous meeting affectionately known as The Looney Nooner, a mysterious woman began appearing. She was well-dressed, but never spoke to anyone beyond polite pleasantries. She always passed whenever it was her turn to testify. Then one day she suddenly rose out of her seat and screamed, "Take it from me!" and then swooned to the ground. As they were reviving her, it was discovered that she was carrying a bottle of Irish whiskey, still in the brown paper bag and unopened. There was also a receipt, showing that she had purchased the bottle over a month before.

Apparently she had bought that bottle but been unable to bring herself to drink from it. At the same time, she couldn't bring herself to throw the bottle away. What exquisite torture! What magnificent willpower!

What a trip....

Today I'm taking a trip to Springfield. Tomorrow I will show you my adventures in words and pictures.


VanDog said...

I had a weird dream last night that the local news in Amherst was in a frenzy over a fallen tree branch. They had "leaf to leaf" coverage. Including an interview with "the guy that pulled the branch out of the road", and pictures of protesters with signs, "Bush knew this could happen, and did nothing". Weird.

Anonymous said...

nice butt shot